The Good Woman Grade: How Guys Decide To Make You Their Lady
photo via love 2 sepia
February is the month of lovers, but yet so many women hate this time of year because of Valentine’s Day. It’s the time of year where you’re forced to focus on the fact that you’re single and alone. When I think about it, it’s one of the only times women don’t like being single. If you’re wondering “how do I find love” or “How do I get a boyfriend?” Then I’ll give you a little bit of insight into the questions guys ask when we grade a females on being a good woman. Good enough to be our official lady.
- Do you make us laugh: We love to laugh, just as much as women like to laugh. So, if we’re spending most of our time making you laugh, then who is going to make us laugh? One thing is certain, you better make sure it’s you making your man laugh before big booty Betty starts cracking jokes.
- Do you make us aspire to be better: There is great power in women, but sadly many of them don’t know they possess such powers. For a good woman knows she has the power to move men to greatness. She has ways to make him want to be better, she does things that make him do better. Ask yourself what are you doing to inspire him?
- Do you encourage our dreams? Men need a woman who fuels their need to be and do better. She knows which buttons to push to help us get up off our ass. She’s there to support us when we take step towards our goals and at the end of the day she’s out biggest cheerleader.
- Force us to go outside of our comfort zone. She is like a mother bird that pushes its young hatchling out of the nest. We ask ourself ‘does she push us to soar.’ Ladies if your man is comfortable working at FedEx his whole life, then you’re not motivating him to his greatest ability. With that said if you feel like you’ve tried your hardest, you’re either doing it wrong or with a guy who has maxed out on his potential. Regardless then it will be time to run.
- How does she take care of home. If you ever lived with someone then you know exactly what this entails. Are you both eating every night. Are the bills getting paid, is she running the house like the boss she is? She doesn’t have to do the cleaning, but she has better make sure the housekeeper comes and goes in a timely manner.
- Representation of us how she dresses, carries herself, etc. – I need a lady. A woman that presents herself in a such a manor that people are impressed when they see me walk in a room with her. I need a girl who represents me and everything I’m about.
- Does she make you proud enough to bring home to momma? I have a saying, there are women you take home to momma and there are women you just take home. It takes a special type of woman for a man to want to introduce her to his mother. To do that you have to be special.
- Is she a sexual intellectual? I hate the saying lady in the streets and a freak in the bed, but it does fit what we want. To see this theory most people need only to look at our grand mother. Do you have 5 or more aunts and uncles? Mmmhmmm! Wonder why grand daddy was so smooth, he was getting it in.
- Is she smart? No matter how sexy she might be, if a woman is not intelligent she could never be the perfect woman. Case it point, when I was 19 I met a girl who told me she was 18 years old but only in the 9th grade. She said she started school late, and stayed back because her parents kept moving. My dumb self believed her. I called her dumb often, but it turns out she was only 15 in the 9th grade. The logic of idiots. She later got fat, because she kept eating McDonalds so she could get thicker. She was tired of being skinny. Needless to say a perfect woman must be educated.
- Does she do the little things? Does she let him lead, allow him to be the man, does she contribute to the cause and isn’t just along for the ride. Does she do the little thing that make us melt inside. If a woman doesn’t do these small things it could be the end of a beautiful thing. Because it’s always the small things that means the most. We must learn the beauty of simplicity.
How to you rank up? 1-3, 3-5 , 5-8 or 8-10 If you got more than 5 you’re a good woman but you could be better. Let me know where you need help at and we can work on getting you better. Feel free to email me. You can find that on my twitter.
~ BlogXilla
You’re only as successful as the people you talk to. Spend your day with ppl with nothing going on, and you’ll have nothing as well.
— BlogXilla (@BlogXilla) February 19, 2013
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LOVED this!!! Great points.
Thanks glad you liked it. So how do you rank up on this list?
Love this!!
Awesome Dionne. So Same question to you. How do you rank? Did you get a passing grade?
Great article! from past realtionships I can say I am a solid 9. I took you up on your offer of help and have shot you an email. I hope you were serious!
A Solid 9? are you sure you’re not grading on a curve? Seriously tho. Which one are you lacking?
Checking the email now. Thanks for sending it over.
im starting to think theres no good point in being a good woman if I can’t find even decent men. How long should I continue doing 1-10 before leaving if he cant reciprocate?
I say if you think you can’t find a decent man you’ll never be able to find one. How can you find a decent man if you don’t think he exist? You’re looking right by the decent dudes for the bums/
I say stop looking for a decent man and search for a great man. Believe he is out there and you will find out. Shit I am out here in these streets and i am an amazing catch.
in addition find new places to meet men and change tha type of men u date. if u don’t change tha scenario tha outcome will always b tha same
From the looks of it 2013 is just like 2012. and hoes are still WINNING. im pretty sure my next man would care more if i can roll his next blunt than if i dress like a lady.
You like blunt rollers? why would you date a man who wants to smoke a blunt? You’re a good woman it’s time you demand a good man to treat you as such! Believe.
I think I’m high on the list. No man right now, but that’s a choice.
Well thats good then when you’re ready to enter the world of dating you shouldn’t have a hard time going to officially status. Thanks for your comment. Hope its not your last.
Thanks for sharing these thoughts with us! I think I’m a 9-10. The problem I have is meeting people. Part oft he problem is that if I’m not working or running errands I’m at home. I go to the gym and museums and concerts because I’d like to meet people with similar interests. I’ve heard it all. I have a dont talk to me look on my face, I’m too independent, not needy enough and other stuff but I truly believe my partner is out there somewhere..til then, life goes on:)
Why not spark some casual conversation. Hey isn’t this work of art nice… Its okay to open the door and let the other person do the rest. Smile at someone you catch looking at you. or just smile. You’re not too independent and you’re the perfect amount of needy to find the person thats right for you. Believe you can and you will find him.
You’re in the right places for the right person you just gotta make that connection. You got what it takes if you’re a 9-10 you’re lil wayne you aint got no worries! lol
I get that i’m too intimidating from men all the time. I honestly think that when a men knows he’s under qualified to be with you, they won’t even bother applying for the position of being your man. And because your ranking up around a 9 or 10, im sure you carry yourself like a qualified woman. For a man who knows he hasn’t ever stepped up to the plate like that before, im sure that is “intimidating”.
Wow!! I see its a few ladies who say they got 90% of the checklist covered…kudos to them lol. This list was definitely on point from a man’s point of view. I hope ladies are really taking this list seriously because its very true….especially the “little things” & “how she dresses/carry herself” columns.
Great post Xilla,
You made some great points. I rank myself about an 8, I know have some things to work on, the problem I have his that I’m very busy, work, home, child, I also have a carefree attitude and that a turn off for some guys that I dated in the pass. With qualities like this I’m sure that the guy for me is some were out there.
Great points. I’d like to think I grade well. I’m not sure whether I make my man aspire to be better though. He is so self-motivated and driven and was this way long before I met him so I know I am not the source of his desire to be the best that he can be which in a way is a good thing cos it means that he’d still strive to improve himself even if I was not around. I encourage him to achieve his goals though, and surpass his own self imposed expectations and do all I can to ensure that he is successful. I realised by reading this that I think I need to stop relying on his self-motivating nature and, as you say, ask myself what I am doing to inspire him? Thank you very much.
Glad to see I scored well. I have all except “sexually intellectual” or at least, I wouldn’t call myself one. Can I still get a pass though?
I would rank myself as a 8 or 9 not a 10 yet because I am not perfect lol but I am a good woman. The area that I would need to improve on would be “Force us to go outside of our comfort zone”. I am not the push type but I will definitely encourage and motivate my man in all aspects of his life.