Do They Put In The Effort To Love You?
Since I started my blog people ask me all types of questions. Most of the questions are about sex, love and relationships. The question that I get asked most is what’s the key to a healthy relationship? Well, I give them the same answer, Effort.
I cannot count the amount of times I’ve chatted with one of my female friends and she tells me a horror stories about a dude she is seeing. Most of the stories are the same regardless of the details. Some of you might even be going through the same thing. You’re dealing with someone who is not putting in the effort to make it work. He’s too busy to call you on the phone. She keeps forgetting to text back when she says I’ll hit you back in 30 minutes. It’s a constant lack of effort that’s leading to heart ache and frustration.
Regardless of the situation I tell them the same thing. If a person wants you they will put forth effort to make it work and if they don’t move on. I say that because there is no such thing as busy when you want to make things work. If you’re really interested in someone you’ll make time, “I can’t see you at 8 but if you have time at 10 I can see you then.”
If you want it to work nothing will stop you from making it happen. It’s that simple, you’ll be an irresistible force to get to the one you want. It might not be when you want it but it will happen. There is no waiting to figure it out. You don’t hold people’s feeling hostage if you want to make things work.
Once upon a time there was a girl I fancied. I tried hard but my conversation just wasn’t hitting. I tried to take her out but she could never make time. But when Drake was in town she made time to be passed around by his entourage. When ASAP’s home she gets a gut full of as soon as possibles. If you know what I mean.
So one night while people watching on the Internet I saw her make an effort for someone with more millions. While I would of gladly dropped some bands to see her dance she didn’t want my brand because if she did she would of put in the effort to make time for us. But she never did and luckily for me, she is someone else’s problem.
I know this because I am the same way. There is another girl who has been trying to get my attention for over ten years but I don’t want her. But, I can’t bring myself up to say I am just not that in to you and she is not getting the hint.
I find that most people don’t get the hint. They get frustrated and upset. They stick around and be unhappy with someone who refuses to do the things the other person needs to make them happy. They refuse to invest time and make an effort to simply be there.
When all the person needs to do in order to be happy is ask them self. Is this person putting in the effort I desire? The effort I am worth and the effort I require? If the answer is no then it might be time to move on.